Roller Coaster

Truly, but the difference is that life is unpredictable.
Even a predictable roller coaster still scares the scream out of us, what about life?

Is like playing peek a boo on a rollercoaster.
Wow?

Wow!

Well anyway, but unlike roller coaster too, God is kind and will give us much happiness once the cliffs are over.

So keep looking forward to tomorrow!

repopulating my blog with this cute picture from AdobeStock

I guess, both of us are at the ends of our mental stability

Branches

I like branches

I like endless possibilities

I like to pointlessly think about how things can go. I like trying new things, and figuring out how fun and magical they are

But often, I forget myself. I open up too many options, and I stand on tiptoes trying to balance them all, and figure out which things to keep and which to throw down before I lose my balance and everything falls down.

Like, right now.

Ahh, but... what do I do? I still find it fun afterall. Even if I already decided on my way, I still like to keep all the other things. Even though it's this messy I still can't drop it.

Eheheh. I'm helpless.

Fakery or Curiosity?

Last lecture I had about Contemporary Architecture left me a big impression.

Actually, there are a lot of things that I just paid attention to lately; of which I finally admit that even if I have known it all along, I have never considered them--and the lectures really help to ground my thoughts and make me pick the correct route of thinking(?).

But anyway!

The lecturer asked us what gave birth to Starchitects and basically every recent Post-Modern architecture, expressionism, and strange weird stuff typical of our life now, and the answer is : consumerism.

That humans, according to Prof. Nuffida, seeks something fake. Something they don't find in their daily life, a condition they don't get in daily life. Just as you would go into a mall just to escape from the heat of a tropical country, a place where you can stroll comfortably and safely, ignoring the reality waiting for you outside. Entertainment and movies to take you to different dimensions. Online identities contrast to who you are.

But... I was thinking...


If you look at it, isn't it just our way of being curious?
Humans naturally enjoys discovering something new. Even for those conservative people who enjoys the comfort of usualness, humans are naturally explorers, with minds that are always revolving, evoluting, testing ideas and ideals and revising them.

Naturally we are pleased and intrigued by things outside of our usual logic, a strange feeling, a different thing. Everyone would enjoy feeling of safety, and comfort, and fun, of something new.

One thing I agree with is, we crave entertainment.

And....yes, even if it's fake. Not everyone can afford to discover things on their own. Whether it's due to capability or will. Human brain loves being stimulated.

And maybe we are all just so incredibly bored.

And I guess, we are getting addicted.

But again, all this can be viewed from numerous point of view. Every coins has two sides.

So while I really am pleased with the thought that everyone is curious living things afterall; it's also time to raise awareness so we don't fall into the dark side of this precious coin.

For you, well, keep finding new things to get curious at!

it seems,

you have been there earlier than me.

though we still choose different paths afterall XD

but it is okay; we are still so different.

i just--

finally I understand.

it's nice.

very nice.

to wake up.

''Are you Alice?''

The girl turned back. Who was the stranger? She never saw him before. The confusion must have been clear in her face, because the stranger smiled sheepishly and introduced himself.

''I am Hatter, a lost traveler. I was told that you are the guardian of this place.''

Alice thought, then nodded. ''Yes, I am. What do you require of me?''

''Can you show me the way to the castle of Jack-of-All-Trades?'' he asked.

Alice looked at him sheepishly, ''Well, unfortunately, I don't have any idea where that is.''

---




- Alice -
A short story.

---
Welcome to wonderland! She had said. She wasn't so regretful to announce that she was also lost in her own land, but she had some idea where the place he was looking for was, and offered to take the journey with him instead--so they could be a little less lost together. There was no other way, so amusedly, he agreed.

The two crossed various landscapes--her airy steps took them wherever the wind blows. Booby traps with bridges accross the dimensions sometimes appeared and took them to totally strange locations, sometimes familiar and other times not. What kind of guardian was she, to be lost in her own land? he thought, still amused. On and on they traveled, battling strange creatures and seeing weird phenomenons, meeting people who was as surprised as her to see her. (Some of them said, I didn't expect to see you again) Some gates posed questions to solve before they could pass through, and some places was such a messy wasteland he had to help her pick up the fallen ruins as she used her magic to place it back where it belong. More and more things show up as they walk by.
They took a long way--or a shorter way, he couldn't tell--but in the end, they reached the destination.

It was tiring, but strangely, he found it rather fascinating. Maybe even fun.

And now, it had ended.

He contemplated a little bit as they braced themselves to say goodbye.

''Thank you, Alice, for taking me here. But, how come you don't know the way in your own land?''

''Well, why do I need to know the way?''

''I don't know. So you don't get lost?''

''But I don't mind being lost.''

He stared at her, intrigued.

''But what if there is somewhere you need to go? What if it makes you late to an appointment?''

''I don't have anywhere I want to go.'' Again, she amused him. ''Besides, it's more fun to just go wherever, and discover whatever. Just enjoy the walk, you know? Be surprised.''

For a moment, he was speechless. ''Well, I suppose that's true,'' he replied genuinely. He was about to go when the thought occured to him.

''What if I want to see you again? Where can I find you?''

Alice stopped in her tracks. ''Um. I don't know...''

He laughed; that was so like her. ''You know what? Meet me here, the one bell after the next solar eclipse. I will wait for you here. How about that?''

''Well...'' she bit her lip, carefully replying, ''I really hope I will see you again,'' she said, smiling. ''But I can't really promise that, I mean...''

''You might get lost, huh?'' he finished her sentence. Smiling, he said, ''It's a long time until then. Try to find your way. A map might be a great idea, you can even use copy magic to help people go around your land.'' When she looked unsure, he added : ''You have a beautiful land, but it's a shame no one visits, because it's too easy to get lost, and too hard to go anywhere.''

''Hmn, it's not like I mind if no one visits...'' she replied, but her eyes were sparkling and her gestures unsure. Hatter grinned at her while turning back, waving.

''Well then, see you, Alice!''

''See you,'' she replied, a little too late.

--

She didn't really know when she started to pay attention to where she was going.

For a long time, she was just going wherever she liked to, as before. Sometimes she thought about the promise, and wondered a little how she could get back to where the Hatter was. But mostly she was thinking of something else, chasing the clouds and walking with the wind.

She didn't know when, but 'if I turn right at that tree, I will find Tweedledee's house' she thought, and was surprised to know that she knew. She didn't really know how she ended up in the Worm's library, purchasing a set of ink and feathers, and empty scrolls made from the sweet cork tree. It was also for food supplies, she argued to herself, but in the end she found them full of scribbles, barely edible anymore.

She now knew, that the blue ape tree always points to the right direction, and the colorful valley of talking flowers was just five minutes away from the red castle, if she used the shortcut across the un-deep-abyss. She now knew the White Rabbit had been late to the meeting so often, that he made a track across the Whispering Woods that everyone call as ''The White Rabbit Track'', and listened to Dodo as he told her the skymap of the big lake; a big help for the aerial forces. Along her adventures, sometimes she found barren land and torched ground, dusty places and messy ruins, that she never really finished healing (she told herself she could always come back and tidy them up little by little). By time she started to realize that the wings of the Flyhorse changed colors in the sunlight, and the painted red roses magically turn pure white at sunrise, and that the cotton-candy clouds told tales by shapeshifting themselves in the sky.

Suddenly she needed another scroll of sweetcork. And blue paints--yellow, red and blue paints.

She needed to draw that beautiful calm water near the castle.

''Chesire, which way is the right way?'' she asked one day to the cat-head floating above the low tree-branch.

Yawning, it replied, ''Well, where do you want to go?''

This time, Alice smiled confidently. ''Castle of Jack-of-all-Trades.''

---

anywhere I am,
I never feel at home

never once,did I feel like
I belong
I wonder why?

I'm always fidgeting on my feet
Smiling for one moment and wobbling at the next

Tugging,
but afraid to hold on

Why?

Then I thought,

Maybe I'm the one who never
Welcomed anyone in

But...how?

Silly Daily

Ehh, I've got so many stupidities I haven't published here XDD

For example.....hmnnn.... if you try to remember it, it's kinda hard huh....

1)
Two weeks ago, me and two of my classmates decided to go on a spontaneous picnic in a nearby park. It was awesome and the weather was so nice. We sat nomadically following the moving sunlight XD

Well, it's near summer, so the sun is out until 8pm.
Maybe that was why we didn't realize the hour had struck 7, and paid no mind as people were leaving.
In the end, we got stuck inside :> no park keeper, secluded entrance too. No shelter. Much panic.
Some portuguese passed by and panicked with us xD

In the end we were lucky to find a place where we can climb out of the park, ofc with much difficulty XD

2)
Just today I was walking down a street when a group of punk kids passed by. I was focused on my phone bcs was chatting someone.

Suddenly, a kid just screamed 'Aaaaaaawwww!' in punk style high-pitched vibrating voice. I jumped a bit, and tried my best to cover my shock. But maybe they recognized after all coz soon one other kid also shouted, 'Aaaaaaawwww!'

Lel what was that, a wolf's call or smth XD

I will come back with more stories when I manage to remember them

Somehow, I often stumble upon secrets I'm not supposed to know

Things people kept so tightly bound that you'd never even guess.

At first, I hated it. Often times they are against everything I believed it. They destroyed my rose-rimmed view of the world, of the people I love. I didn't want to know, I'd rather not know.

Sometimes I lied to my self, convincing that it was just a mistake. But then absolute prove slaps me in the face.

Nowadays... sometimes I;m not even surprised anymore.
And seeing them conjure the prettiest lie about it...

I laugh. It gets funny.

Nowadays, my beautiful wonderland has transformed anyway. So I thought, maybe, it is better that I know.
Because if you look at it from a different view...it makes life much more enjoyable. Entertaining.

I don't look through rose-rimmed canvas anymore.
I guess, nowadays I'm looking into a screen--or a book page--instead.

ung
jauhnya,
jauh sekali

earth song

By chance, Youtube just played Earth Song by Michael Jackson as a company to my overdue homework...
The song is so damn beautiful, and when it ended, I just found myself burst into tears and couldn't stop.
Suddenly all the attacks and bombing felt so real. Trees aged hundreds of years really turned into stumps in a frightening speed as I type this. We colored the once lush marshlands into black, suffocated so many lives with a cheap plastic of our cotton candies....and...it feels like the world is truly coming to and end soon, maybe. Human stupidity is getting worse and worse and I just feel so helpless. How can I help? Did I ever helped at all?
I feel so weak and insignificant. The earth is crying and most of us can't really do a thing....

what a sad thing. poor trees. poor elephants, tigers, everything.
i am sorry, earth

Hey there

Are you okay?

I always pray that you are.

I loved autumn, and spring seems to flash by so quickly! It was just yesterday that the plum blossomed, now everything had turned into leafy green and red~

I used to count the days before I met you,
not knowing what it was even for
I counted to seven and it was Sunday,
and I'd groan because on the morrow it would be back to one again

I didn't count the days after I met you,
because time flew so fast
colors struck me and it felt like there was
a thousand more important thing to take note of,
so why bother?
And I know, even if I didn't,
you'd smile,
take up the chalk,
and scribble the counts for me.

I didn't want to count the days after you left me,
because the days were long, and the sunshine left imprints in my eyes.
But I picked up your counts anyway, while boredom consumed my mind
in this space where you once existed

It's getting dull here.
Won't you come back?
Saw the counts today, and I think it's been long enough.
Do you miss me yet?

-an old poem and an old artwork-

''You never really cared about what goes on around you. I've been waiting, always, for the day that you'd start asking these questions. The day you long to understand, the day you would turn into an adult.''

''Please give me some more time.''

-or something like that, Goblin.

I've been having bad thoughts again about you, about us.
About the worth of 'us'
and your still veiled thoughts....

I'm supposed to understand but I really don't really.

This gut feeling, I will ignore it?
 
I hope it's just a bad wind that went through my pounding head.

jadi......

kota yang baik itu adalah kota yang teratur. seperti halnya dalam taman, manusia itu terbiasa menjadi 'penguasa'--'to be in charge'--seperti yang dijelaskan oleh dosenku. untuk itu kita butuh adanya sedikit keteraturan berupa pengulangan pola dan bentuk, dan ukuran. namun manusia juga makhluk yang mencintai keindahan maka variasi sangat diperlukan juga. bila tidak, maka keteraturan akan berubah menjadi kebosanan.

selain itu kota yang menarik haruslah memiliki identitas, suatu alasan yang dapat membuat orang bepikir 'ah, aku ingin mengunjunginya!', sesuatu yang hanya ada di sana. identitas lokal adalah hal yang sangat krusial--lagi-lagi ini telah dijelaskan sebelumnya, entah berapa kali, namun memang kadang otak menolak untuk benar-benar mempelajarinya. banyak cara untuk memperlihatkan identitas lokal, salah satunya dengan bentuk khas yang dipengaruhi budaya dan iklim/klimat, serta bahan-bahan lokal, dan juga hasil karya lokal. hasil karya lokal ini contohnya adalah kerajinan ukiran yang begitu populer di Indonesia, azulejos atau keramik yang dilukis tangan yang sangat umum di sini di Portugal, ataupun ukiran barok pada limestone yang kita jumpai di bangunan tua Eropa.

hidupkan juga tipologi bangunan sekitar, vendor-vendor jalanan semacam warung kaki lima dan toko kelontong yang mungkin terlihat tidak elit namun membawa suasana yang benar-benar Indonesia banget, misalnya. dekorasi dengan keindahan yang ada, maka perlahan ini akan mendapatkan daya tariknya sendiri.

lalu, yang juga tidak kalah penting adalah kepadatan kota. sebenarnya, kota yang padat itu nyaman dan praktis, dimana penduduknya tak perlu menyetir satu jam hanya untuk menemukan kafe, restauran, minimarket, ataupun fasilitas kesehatan terdekat. kurangi kebutuhan kendaraan pribadi tidak hanya dengan pedestrian namun juga pengembangan transportasi publik yang lebih baik dan dapat diandalkan.

manusia adalah makhluk sosial, maka satu hal lagi yang perlu dipertimbangkan adalah pengembangan public space di kota. kota yang padat kadang terasa menyesakkan, maka diperlukan adanya refuge, dimana orang-orang dapat bersantai dan berkegiatan dengan nyaman. berilah sentuhan alam dan sedikit atraksi, buat ia aman untuk anak-anak. maka akan dapat ditemukan public space yang hidup dan turis-able.

((sayangnya public space di Indonesia biasanya tidaklah praktis--bukankah aneh kita harus naik motor jauh untuk sekedar hang out di taman?))

then again... semua juga tergantung dengan budaya sekitar. pelajarilah tempat dimana engkau berada, kenallah orang-orangnya dan sejarah mereka, dan buatlah perubahan dengan effort minimum dan effect maksimum.




heheheh, random banget ya?