Menabur Luka di Garam

Menanyakan 'Kapan ITS libur?'

itu seperti menabur luka di garam

seperti bertanya pada orang desa, 'Pernah makan steak nggak?'

seperti nanya orang yang belum move on, 'Kapan terakhir ketemu mantan?'

seperti nanya orang yang lagi homesick, 'Kapan pulang?'

seperti nanya ke orang gurun, 'Kira-kira hujannya kapan yak?'

seperti Pipit nanya Ayam, 'Kenapa kamu nggak bisa terbang?'

/gaseparahitusihtapiiii


(it's been a while, this page had lost some of it's originally intended funi-ness. 
Kalimat pertama sengaja kebalik karena waktu pertama kali ngomong itu aku kebalik sangking emosinya (dan diketawain, daily failure, ugh.))

though

was what I said, but help me, I'm trembling so hard over here




though I know better than to dump a share of weight onto shoulders that can barely hold theirs




though somehow I'm still surprised over the fact that you don't really care




though I should have gotten over the fact many whiles ago




though I know..... what, I'm just rattling and fussing senselessly. and it's not sommat you should be worrying about.




though.....

Still a Wonderland

I feel like my life's falling apart in front of me

I hope it's just my negative thinking.

It's not like it's never fell apart before though...

I just gotta rebuild it.

I'll take this numbness as a goodness, maybe it's my way of being strong all those times?

It will be okay!

I can do everything!

Someday I will turn the tables around, too!

Someday...

Butterfly

fluttered around
it found a rose
a lavender
a geranium
sniffing around,
picking up pollens,
dropping as it landed on a sunflower.

in the end, no seed sprang out

the butterfly, of course, didn't know

or it did, but it could help but to get disturbingly attracted
to the colors of the world

by larin_nickolay.deviantart.com

ffn challenge

-

Sepasang bola mata sekelam malam menatap lurus di balik beningnya kacamata. Rambut kecoklatan seleher yang berantakan tak digubrisnya. Mulutnya terkatup rapat dalam monolog bisu. Entah mengapa ujung bibir kemerahan itu selalu tertarik gravitasi, bahkan saat ia tersenyum. Diperhatikannya beberapa jerawat kecil yang bermunculan di ujung pipinya, dan ia pun mendecakkan lidahnya. Mungkin sebatang coklat dalam sehari memang tidak baik untuk anak gadis seusianya...


-

Dia tidak cantik. Dia bukanlah dewi, peri, ataupun seorang putri. Namun, setidaknya wajah chubby di balik cermin itu tidak menyakiti mata. Entah mengapa, akhir-akhir ini disadarinya hal itu.
Dirinya yang tak pernah peduli dengan sekitarnya, dengan bagaimana ia terlihat, dengan padangan umum yang disukai orang lain... kini mulai peduli dengan penampilannya. Entahlah. Tiba-tiba saja...

Ia ingin menjadi cantik.

Namun ia rasa itu hal yang normal. Itu bukanlah obsesi, hanya gumaman sendiri. Biarlah, mungkin suatu saat nanti ia tak akan memiliki protes lagi

-

Apa yang dipikirkannya? Terkadang ia berhenti dan melamun, alisnya berkerut dalam pikiran yang dalam. Terkadang ia menghela nafas. Di saat yang lain ia tersenyum sendiri, kadang sambil menggeleng pelan. Ia sendiri kadang takjub dengan isi pikirannya yang bagai nasi campur. Atau roller coaster. Campur aduk, dan naik turun.

-

Jujur saja, ia tidak begitu menyukai dirinya sendiri. Terlalu banyak kekurangan yang ia miliki. Namun, ia juga tak lupa mensyukuri. Apapun yang terjadi, ia akan tetap bangga pada dirinya sendiri.

-

Semoga.

no, not anyone's birthday here. just thought that the picture's pretty nice. not mine too. zerochan.net/1706253

Happy Independence Day '69, Indonesia!

look, I made something for ya.

and something else...

Wish us peace and prosper!

Yeah, A New Post, Finally

I can't even pin my fingers on when was the last time I checked on this blog.

Was it really the writer's block intense pressure, or...?

I don't know. My life had taken a series of turns since then. Things came, things go. I weep, I let go. I frown, I smile. Nothing is constant, and life keeps giving you surprises and disappointment, but in the end I just gotta accept it all. We all do.

Me? I just have to look closely into the small crumples of flowers, the patterns formed between the falling leaves, the whispers slowly delivered by the calm evening wind as I close my eyes, enjoying the long ride home. I just have to feel the beauty, the magnificence of it all. How it all feel marvelous--how my problems seem to shrink before it.

And if that's not enough, I just gotta watch as my little sister laughed. My mother smiled, my father joked around with little children who once in a while would cross the road just before the door. I just have to see, and feel, and understand, that there's always so much things to be grateful about, so many things that clearly speak of the magnificence of life, and the beauty of everyday, and also... so many people that you should have not let pass, should not take for granted.

Love them back, cherish them as they would to you. Keep them safe, pray for their happiness.

And there would be nothing for you to complain about.

-Ela-